How to Deal with Bad Habits Your Child Picked Up from Their Peers
Parents must have occasionally reflected on the days when their kids were still tiny and impressionable. Parents may assume it was simpler when their children were still reliant on them, even though it may be a proud moment to watch them grow up. This is particularly valid in terms of their social group. Parents had more influence over their children’s social circle when they were younger, and it was simpler to see who they were socializing with.
On the other hand, young people will start to become more independent and interact with various social groups as they get older and attend higher education levels. They’ll begin to chat with a lot of people their parents don’t know and start to develop their own acquaintances. Although this is positive and friendships are crucial for personal development, there’s a danger that they could be exposed to negative influences at this time.
Let’s just say that no parent wants their child involved in any kind of gang or troublemaking that involves questionable behaviors. However, as the child is just beginning to become self-sufficient, they might not be as accepting of their parents taking charge of the circumstances. It might not be simple to turn them back onto the correct path, and as their parent, you can find yourself at a loss for what to do. Fear not, though, since we’ll be talking about how to deal with your child picking up undesirable habits from their friends in this post.
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How to know if your child is under bad influences?
You won’t be around to see your child’s every move as they get older. They experience their first taste of independence along with their development. The question is, though, how can parents tell when their child is among unfavorable people? The clearest indication will be when they begin to behave differently from what is typical for them and begin to disrupt the previously developed positive behaviors. A few more behaviors that indicate they are being negatively influenced include starting to smoke and drink, using foul language more frequently, acting aggressively toward their parents, staying out beyond curfew or bedtime, and many more.
However, it should also be noted that some habits aren’t picked up from their friends or classmates. Some habits can also be picked from constant exposure to relatives or family members who do the same.
What to do if your child has picked up bad habits?
Now that you know how to identify if your child is getting bad influence from their peers or not, it’s time to look at what you can do as a parent to help them.
1. Know who they are socializing with
Knowing who their child’s pals are from preschool or primary school is a simple task for parents. However, friendship groupings can evolve throughout time, and although parents may believe they are aware of their child’s buddies, this isn’t always the case. Some may even tell their parents about well-known names while going out with a different group of people.
Parents ought to also not disregard friendships made online as well. They can meet new people online and in the neighborhood who are not from their school or community thanks to technological advancements. Your child can meet a wide range of individuals online, and since they can converse online as well, meeting them digitally isn’t all that different from meeting them in person. This could also explain why, even in cases where your kid doesn’t go out much, you see a shift in their behavior.
But nobody wants their parents to be nosy about their belongings or to lose faith in them. You have to be more discreet while still respecting their privacy if you want to know more about the child’s peer group. Say you may offer to drop your child off at their hangout if they are gathering with their friends. You can meet your child’s pals in this way, and you can observe how they present themselves. Judging by their looks and how they carry themselves may not be enough to gauge one’s personality so you can also suggest inviting your child’s friends over for dinner or some games. This will allow you more time to see what they are like and even speak with them.
2. Ask about their friends
Parents and children must communicate, especially as the child grows older. Being open and communicative with each other can help you stay informed about what your child is doing and maintain a solid link throughout time. For this reason, parents need to practice regular communication with their children so that they will carry this trait into adulthood.
But you can tone it down a notch by not asking directly about their peers if you are worried that your child will think you are intrusive for questioning so openly about their acquaintances. Asking them about their day with their friends is a better option. You can also try to persuade them to elaborate on their descriptions of their peers when they begin to talk about their day. You already know which pals your child shouldn’t spend out with when they describe peer conduct that isn’t always considered appropriate.
3. Be honest about your opinions
After you hear about your child’s friend’s description from them, be honest with what you think of them. Let your child know about your honest opinions on how you feel about them hanging out with the sort.
Giving your honest assessment does not, however, imply that you disapprove of your child’s buddy or the friends they have chosen. This will simply make the child more likely to argue and get hostile. If this occurs, the child can experience intense mistrust and be more likely to conceal things from you. Since they are still young, they might attempt to stand up for their pals. Help them understand why you feel the way you do by giving them an explanation rather than passing judgment. There’s no assurance that conflicts won’t arise, but if they do, try to refrain from speaking in a hurtful manner. You run the danger of saying something unintentionally and end up hurting your child’s feelings.
4. Encourage them to trust their gut feelings
Our gut feelings are typically right, and parents should be able to instill in their kids the confidence to follow their intuition. For the child, this can be especially helpful in situations where they need to make a quick decision. For instance, if your child’s classmates invite them to skip class so they can go out, tell them they already know right from wrong and to follow their instincts.
Early instruction in self-confidence will help children develop a sense of independence and the knowledge that their parents value their ability to make independent decisions. As they get older and have to choose between doing the right or wrong thing, it will be simpler for them to follow their instincts.
5. Let the child know of your expectations
These days, parents could be too preoccupied with earning a living and working to ensure that their kids have everything they need. Frequently, though, they can be too worn out to talk to their child at home. Additionally, the youngster may feel disoriented and perplexed at this age since they are growing up and learning new things. If you are unable to find time for conversation with your child, they will likely turn to their peers for communication.
During this period, your child needs advice, and parents are the best people to provide it to them rather than their peers. Therefore, you should constantly make the time and effort to talk to your kids about the things you expect of them, including doing well in school and acting appropriately. There won’t be as much concern for your child’s future because of the time and effort you may invest during this period.
6. Discipline accordingly
Disciplining a child is a tough topic to talk about and a touchy one at that. There are many opinions on which action is best when disciplining however, the best way to go about this is to make sure the punishment is based on what they have done.
You can talk to your child about a less serious issue, like getting caught talking to their friend in class, and threaten to punish them more severely if they get caught doing it again. You can ground your child and set a curfew if the behavior is more serious, such as going out after dark with their buddies. How you discipline your child should be based on the circumstances. This will assist them in realizing the effects of what they are doing.
7. Coordinate with teachers and tutors
It’s time to schedule a meeting with the child’s teacher when things get out of control and they keep acting differently. You could ask them to assist you in correcting your child. Teachers deal with a wide range of students, each with unique personalities and histories. Additionally, they have a great deal of expertise in handling wayward pupils. Arrange or request a meeting with your child’s educators to seek guidance and assistance. Because of this, they may assist with disciplining and keeping an eye on them during class as they will be present.
You can also engage a home tutor to teach your child, who can also serve as a confidante and offer positive, helpful guidance if you are too busy at work to support them and guide them in the proper direction. Home tutors receive training on how to build relationships and impart moral principles to their students. In this manner, you can also guarantee that your child is under capable care.
Conclusion
Finding the right mix between understanding and guidance is crucial when coping with negative behaviors that your child may pick up from their peers. Children’s social networks widen as they get older and more self-reliant, which might occasionally expose them to harmful influences. Parental involvement, open communication, and discreetly monitoring behavioral changes are all ways that parents can support their children. Restoring self-confidence, setting clear expectations, and enlisting the aid of educators when required can all aid in putting kids back on the correct track. In the end, encouraging open communication and trust empowers kids to make wiser decisions while still experiencing their parents’ support.
Carelle
Carelle is a teacher who has been through the ups and downs of the teacher and learner life. She wishes for every learner to gain educational satisfaction that will help embody the people they want to be in the future.